The Low Down on the EXTREMELY interesting happenings of the past week...

It has been a week... Yes a week... Such a long time... So much can happen in a week, like I could totally overthrow the democratic system in NZ... Oooo and I could bewitch a pod of dolphins into a colony of mermaids and then live with them under the sea in their beautifully intricate castles of shells and jewels and other shiny things and pretty colours and exquisite music with perfect little trills and other decorative flourishes... Oh and I could also redetermine that school is a COMPLETE waste of time... Oooo and how could I forget... Johnny Coltrane is a genius (and so is Michael Frenti- "we can bomb the world to pieces but we can't bomb it into peace")... So cool...

Here's how it went...
School- Work- School- Work- School- School- Music- Photography- Music- Latin- More Music

Such an interesting week... O yes it was... Such a beautiful little arrangement there... O yes you are... Yes you are... Yes... Don't argue with me you spineless evil excuse for a timetable...

Jeez some people....

I'm sorry yes I am tired... Extremely so... I blame Laurence... But only because I am one of those people who don't like admitting defeat... Especially that it's my fault that everything has gone wrong and the entire world is about to explode because it's tired of the waves of uselessness I seem to exude... But o well...

O yes Char's party was a blast... Silly Chris... You'd think he was a pyromaniac... Unless... Is he? Hmmm interesting thought... A revelation of revelations....

Halloween tomorrow... I don't like Halloween at all. I think it is just an excuse to make the children of the world fat and unhealthy and completely introverted and scarred for life. I mean what's with sending our kids out the door, saying "Have a nice time" while thinking "Am I ever going to see sweet Sarah and brilliant Bob ever again, because I am sending them out into the DARK, into the STREETS riddled with murderers and psychos, and forcing them upon unsuspecting victims who open their doors expecting the postman when really they are bombarded with streams of children wanting lollies... What could stop those people from taking my poor children?! O woe is me!" Personally, I think that if people continue to celebrate Halloween, instead of "candy", the children should be given a stick of celery... Or a lettuce... Or even a BOWL of salad... How lucky would those children be? Their teeth and faces will be saved from complete mutilation and horrid destruction... Plus, it's much better for the environment when the kids decide to throw away their "loot" at the end of the night (because they're already feeling sick)... If the earth had to choose between being covered in celery or suger infested sweets, I'm pretty sure the earth would choose the celery.

THANKFULLY I'm working tomorrow night so I don't have to listen to the countless children coming to the door whining: "Trick or Treat?" And me standing there thinking: "Just LEAVE ME ALONE!!!" And trying not to stick a sign up on my gate stating: "Come through here and our big, ghastly and EVIL dog will eat you alive. Have a nice day :)"... But I did think that the Governor General was having a Halloween Party... I even thought that he could dress up like a pumpkin (the reasons are rather obvious)... I was even kindof excited by the prospect of a Halloween Party... Imagine the Helen Clark posing as Frankenstien... Oh that would be convincing!... But no the Prince and the Princess of the Netherlands are coming to dinner... So that should be interesting in itself...

Gosh I'm rambling... I'm tired... Needless to say because I have been and still am tired I have constantly been logadaedelating... Hell I even logadaedelated the logadaedelis...

I need help...

O well that's life...

Ciao xxx

Thankyou guys!

I really must thank those of you who have been so supportive of me in my time of need... Especially Laurence and Kelda... (well you are the only ones who know (those that I've told anyway) at this point in time)

THANKYOU!!!!!

Without trying to sound religious or anything, I feel blessed to have friends like you.

"I believe in angels,

The kind that heaven sends,
I am surrounded by angels,
But I call them friends."

A poem just for you guys... not that inspirational but that's what you are to me...

Forget-me-not

Ciao xxx

P.S. I did not mean this blog to sound so...hmmm... religious... But I think that heaven can exist without a God... and anyway, who's to say that heaven exists because there is a "God"...

And plus who can define heaven anyway? It means and represents many different things to each of us...

Exciting News Everyone!!!

The thing that I have been waiting for for soooo long has finally been given to me! Yes! Wahooo! I will be attending a wedding....

My own!....

No just kidding (sorry Laurence if I freaked you out)... my father and Nicky are FINALLY getting married. It's going to be so cute... A beach wedding; white sand, white dress, light zephyr, smiles, sun, red flowers.... oh so lovely....

Ahhhhhh I'm so excited! Anyhu back to music...

Forget-me-not

Ciao xxx

P.S. Oh and something that is not exciting is... Nick texted me last night and again today... I will not repeat what he said for it has some... inappropriate language.... and it's too traumatising to relive... I seriously dislike him... And that is all i have to say on the matter... Apart from i wish Nick would forget-me...

Note this day in your diaries peoples (well at least those of you who care)

I am listening to Bartok's Concerto for Orchestra, and it seems that i have changed my mind....

I actually like it again.........

Anyway back to work

Forget-me-not

Ciao xxx

Procrastination and a random Marxist philosopher

I knew this blog would be a bad idea… Right now I’m writing this post instead of doing my music assignment because the music assignment is sooooo boring. What is up with boring assignments? Why can’t they make them more interesting… Let it be a form of creative incubation….

Anyway I’m feeling sick today… Not a nice feeling… Sore back, sore shoulders, sore head… feeling kind of dizzy… But that’s life, you have to get on with it especially when you’re supposed to be doing work… O well…

It’s raining again… I like it when it rains… It’s cosy… If only Laurence was here… A cute little poem always makes things better… such as this one by Robert Louis Stevenson…

"The rain is raining all around,
it falls on field and tree.
It rains on the umbrellas here,
And on the ships at sea."

I think I have procrastinated enough and now I really must get back to it... Well at least try...

Forget-me-not

Ciao xxx

P.S. I forgot to write something insightful... Did you know that a philosopher that believed heavily in Marxism came up with the idea is that things only exist as they as to us because we made them that way? Take a horse for example, he believed that we made the horse, because we named it so... Then the question arises if we did not name the four legged, long nosed, neighing animal, a horse, what would it be?
To quote Shakespeare: "A rose with any other name would smell as sweet." To us, a horse is a horse because it is named that way... In essence a horse would still be the same thing but because it would not be named 'a horse' it would not be a horse... Get it?

Contemplation: Good or Bad?

What is contemplation? Contemplation comes from the Latin root templum, and means to separate something from its environment. In a religious sense it is a type of prayer or meditation. In a non-religious sense, contemplation means “to think steadily” or “to consider with attention”. We hear about it being an act of positive self affirmation, or thinking positively or neutrally about something, hell even ‘Navajo’ (a band) has dedicated an entire album to contemplative music.
But is contemplation a good thing, when it only leaves our hearts aching? When it leaves us crying? When it raises questions we don’t want to answer? Where else can we draw the line between negative and positive contemplation but the line at which we decide what makes us happy.

Yet it’s not so black and white.

How do we know what makes us happy, when so often it also makes us sad? Why is it that love is filled with happiness but it also is overflowing with sadness?… Why is it that thinking about being happy often leaves us dejected and gloomy, with an ache in the heart that doesn’t go away?… I guess the only answer to this riddle is that there is no answer… And that the only thing that will provide even a ounce of sense is contemplation itself…

"Look at the flowers, so faithful to what is earthly,
to whom we lend fate from the very border of fate.
And if they are sad about how they must wither and die,
perhaps it is our vocation to be their regret.

All Things want to fly. Only we are weighed down by desire
caught in ourselves and enthralled with our heaviness.
Oh what consuming, negative teachers we are
for them, while eternal childhood fills them with grace.

If someone were to fall into intimate slumber, and slept
deeply with Things-:how easily he would come
to a different day, out of the mutual depth.

Or perhaps he would stay there; and they would blossom
and praise
their newest convert, who now is like one of them,
all those silent companions in the wind of the meadows."

Sorry about that… Just had to get it off my chest… Plus I needed a distraction from my incredibly boring music assignment…

Forget-me-not

Ciao xxx

P.S. Hehehe my father is thinking about doing some more post grad. work... Specifically, the effects of music on the maintenance of depression in adolescent males... That could be a very interesting read....

Shock Horror!!!

Shock Horror!!! No this is not a dream! (though if you are dreaming of me…keep dreaming) Yes I, Alexandra Smith, have finally made a blog. I admit defeat… I have surrendered my soul to the horrors of peer-pressure, to experience delight in posting the mundane events of my life on the internet. It is almost as bad as wearing black skinny leg jeans (Go Tradg!) with no top on… Yes, I know you have no idea what I am talking about… Thank goodness I do know what I’m talking about… This is catastrophic! As soon as I open my mouth (or in this case let loose on a keyboard) things turn from bad to worse…

Anyway lets move on before things get awkward… O the interesting things that have happened to me today! Such joy! Such happiness! I hope you note I’m being the most sarcastic I’ve ever been in my entire life… I woke up with a splitting headache, when I finally persuaded myself to go and get some Panadol, I was shouted at by my rude little sister, which made my head pound more and more, as though it was keeping in rhythm with an unheard drum… and then the dimmest, most spiteful young man threw a rock at our front window! Thankfully it didn’t break (the window not the rock) but all I wanted to do was to go outside, pick up that rock, throw it at him, hit him in the head, making him dazed, which would mean he would then walk onto the road, and hopefully get hit by a bus. But no, I’m not a violent person (…she shifts uncomfortably as many an eyebrow flies through the roof and disbelieving looks perforate the intense darkness and sadistic realms of her mind…), so I would not do that… Honestly… But man, it just made my head hurt more and I believe in self-defence and if there is ever a time to defend yourself, it is when a callous, heartless, pathetic excuse for a human being throws rocks at your windows…

Aaaaaaanyway, moving on… Last night I went out to dinner and a movie with Laurence… He’s such a gentleman… It was one of those Italian Film Festival ones, “13 at a table”, and it was quite a stunning film, really rather beautiful. It made me want to move to Italy (although I have wanted to do that for a very, very long time, so it didn‘t really make me want to. I guess it just made me re-realise my dreams, rebuild that foundation for the future) but then again many good films have made me want to move to the place where they’re set… I mean, take “Lord of the Rings” for example. It made me want to move to Middle Earth until I realised that it wasn’t actually a real place, and then after this epiphany it made me want to move to New Zealand, until I realised I actually already lived here… Yes, I am blonde.
Anyway back to this film, the storyline was quite simplistic but so effective… Sad but so happy… I won’t bore you with a lengthy synopsis (lengthy kind of defeats the purpose of it being a synopsis but who cares) or an in depth analysis of character, symbolism or significance of setting or any of that sort of stuff but I do want to highlight one thing… This film is about Love.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, Love with a capital letter. The thing you need the most, the thing that needs you the most. This film helped me cement something I had thought of a while ago… That no matter how long Love lasts, or what type of Love it is/was, it provides a sense of completion. Giulio (the main character), before he met the beautiful Anna was a nobody, just a breath on reality. But as he fell in love with her, deeply and completely, he became someone… Love is a silent whisper to penetrate melancholy isolation… I know this is a bit abstract (even though I’ve tried to put it simply as possible) and a lot of you won’t understand it… But hey, you will sometime. Rilke can explain it far better than I can…

“How can I keep my soul in me,
so that it doesn't touch your soul?
How can I raise it high enough, past you, to other things?
I would like to shelter it, among remote
lost objects, in some dark and silent place
that doesn't resonate when your depths resound.
Yet everything that touches us, me and you,
takes us together like a violin's bow,
which draws one voice out of two separate strings.
Upon what instrument are we two spanned?
And what musician holds us in his hand?
Oh sweetest song.”

Anyway, I better go and do some work before I get tooooo sentimental.

Forget-me-not

Ciao